Wellness

Looking for Work-Life Balance? Here’s What to Do Instead.

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Has your BFF or partner said this to you lately: “You need to find some balance between your work and home-life.”?  

 

Actually, they may not have said that to you, they may have shouted that AT you while you were pinging from work stuff to family stuff to everything in between.

 

Does this scenario sound all too familiar?

 

If you struggle with the balancing act of work and life — first of all — know you’re not alone (we battle with it as well).

 

And also, keep in mind there’s a different way to view “balance”.

 

Here’s what we’re talking about…

 

 

Is Work-Life Balance a Myth?

 

Did your mom stay home to raise you and she thinks you should do the same?

Did your dad work long hours and weekends to provide the “best possible life” for you?

Does your sibling(s) buck the family system and believe you should live it up as much as possible?

Does your grandma harp on you to not work weekends?

 

Whatever scenario you were raised in, when it comes to the beliefs around what it takes to achieve work-life balance, there comes a time when YOU have to know what you believe.

 

So many times, we take in the world around us without filtering and deciphering what truly works for us — not for mom, dad, sister, brother, grandma, grandpa and great uncle Steve.

 

That’s why we have to ask ourselves, “Is work-life balance a myth?”

 

Work-life balance may not exist at all, because oftentimes, we’re living out someone else’s version of it— not our own.

 

So, what do you do when work-life balance is a myth?

Seek alignment.

 

Align-who, you might be asking.

Let us explain…

 

 

Work-Life Alignment

No, we’re not talking about going to the chiropractor and getting adjusted (although, that can help, too).

 

What we’re talking about is alignment with your work-life…not balance.

 

“Aim for work-life alignment by crafting a meaningful professional life that matches up with who you are and what’s important to you.” – Patricia Thompson, Ph.D

 

The work-life concept described by Patricia Thompson, Ph.D integrates your core values, meaningful relationships, and awareness of what areas in your life are not fully aligned.

So what does that look like in everyday life?

How to Seek Work-Life Alignment 

Ever thought your life was on the hot mess express? We’ve probably all been there and that’s why the harder we seek balance in work-life, the farther away that “goal” becomes.

Why? Because life is full of ups and downs and the more we work with them, the easier alignment can be.

Here are some tips on how to move towards more work-life alignment:

• Seek relationships, friendships, and circumstances that lift you up; not drain you.

If your work is a source of contention look at other areas of your life that can help ease that work burden. That might mean saying buy-bye to that toxic friend you keep around for no good reason or asking for help from your partner around the house.

• Accept that balance is a myth + integrate your values.

What can you take with you everywhere you go? Your core values.

Whether that looks like working a little extra one week because you have upcoming travel, or getting your meal-prep on like the boss that you are so you can eat what helps you feel your best — it’s all about integrating the things that matter most to you.

Not every day or week will look the same and oftentimes, accepting that work-life alignment looks different from time-to-time can help you feel good about showing up fully as your best self — in work and life.

• Drop the guilt.

If you’re a human then you know life is not always linear (even as hard as we try to make it be).

Life is full of hiccups and speed-bumps, roaring highways and curvy mountain roads. When we can stop throwing guilt and shame on ourselves, life can open up in ways that give us options to take the slow lane, or pass the Sunday drivers — but only when we realize we’re all doing the best we can with what we have.

So drop the guilt and raise your glass to riding the waves of work-life alignment — with your core values intact and more areas of your life — than not — that fill you up!


RENEW | 719.423.0083


2018 Reflections from Dr. Elijah + Charmayne

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“We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.”

– Dolly Parton

  

With 2018 coming to a close – we decided to look back on this year with some reflections + life lessons we’re definitely taking with us into 2019 and beyond.

  

We hope these nuggets help you!

 

 

Dr. Elijah | 2018 Reflections

  

•  Life’s too short to be offended by everything. 

I think taking offense to everything just makes us angry all the time. I got caught up in all the politics for a while, but I felt myself just being triggered by others and that made me feel anger and irritation, so I blocked the negativity on social media. Often times the power really does belong within us!

 

•  Encourage your kid to graduate early. 

Not only does this save you a lot of money, it also allows your kid to jump into a possible career earlier or get in some travel before starting a job.

  

•  Starting a new business and renovating a building is hard work! 

When I embarked on starting a new business and renovating a building, I never could have imagined what those two endeavors could entail. I have new admiration for all those entrepreneurs out there and showing up every day – especially when curveballs get thrown your way!  

 

 

Charmayne | 2018 Reflections

 

•  Friends are the family you choose for yourself.

I’ve learned blood isn’t the only requirement for family – it can also be friends who come into your life and make your world SO much better. I’m grateful I’ve embraced friends who are just like family to me.

 

•  Self-care is not selfish.

Taking care of yourself mentally, physically and emotionally is an absolute requirement before you can even think about taking “care” of anyone else. It may have taken me a while to learn this one, but I’m happy I can see the benefit of self-care (like, don’t even come at me if I haven’t done at least 10 burpees)!

 

•  Nourish connections.

Sometimes you find connections with people you never thought would be a part of your life. I’ve learned not to shirk those bonds – even when I can’t fully understand why a certain person was placed in my life. Whether someone is in your life for a particular reason, a specific season or throughout your lifetime – soak all the lessons in that you can!

 

 

Here’s to all the life lessons that’s shaped you throughout this year + the lessons carrying you into the new year.

 

 

Cheers, 2019 –

Dr. Elijah + Charmayne